Just Rolling Over and Closing My Eyes

Again, “we”, my team and I, are raising money for the Mahoning Valley MS walk. It is on April 21st, 2012 at the Scrappers Stadium. I will include a link to my page. There you can donate or join my team “Spot the Cause”. I hope you all will find it in your hearts to help support this cause that is so near and dear to my heart. A little goes a long way, a friend to walk with goes further.

Well, I said before that I just wanted to focus on school. With our resources, I was able to do so and I am currently enrolled. However, I had to take one of those “you can’t take another class unless you finish this one” classes. So only taking one class was a pain in the butt! I am so glad it is over with now! But sitting around the apartment, bored, was not helping me. Plus I am taking online course so human interaction was very little, unless you count my dogs. I love them to death but they don’t really talk back. So I got a job. 

I am very impressed with the job functions so far. The only killer is that I have to be up by 5:45 am and out the door by 7. Learning something new for anyone would be tiring. Tie in MS and medication and I am exhausted! Then school after work, and by 9:30 pm my eyes are closing and I am off. With Rebif, I get flu-like symptoms. So I even walked into work with a fever from the night before! I am working through it. I have done it before, but the only difference, when I was diagnosed I already knew my job very well. So when I tied in the medications and the shock value it wasn’t so overwhelming. Starting a new shot with a new job, that’s A LOT OF NEW.

Early April I get to see my Neuro again for a checkup. I do believe we will be ordering a scan to see if the disease has progressed. Who knows at this point! I am just hoping that 44 MCG’s, 3 times a week is enough to silence MS for a little bit. With the relapse I had, I know there will be additional damage that may not be repaired and I am prepared for that. But I am trying to prepare myself for if the medication has failed again. With my ever so changing moods and self-confidence I am just trying to cope and be as happy as I can.

With an ever changing disease I expect some light can peak through and give me some more hope. Things can change so fast, and people may not realize until it happens to you. My eyes are wide open, my heart is full, and my mind is trying to clear out the clutter. I am at times hopeless, scared, tired, over worked, and mad. But in life, who isn’t? The only difference is that any second something important, like the ability to see or the ability to walk can be taken away and could never return. Science can only go so far but it is the drive that pulls you through and shows you the possibilities. Remember, you never know what someone goes through unless you walk a mile in their shoes. 

With love,

Amber

http://main.nationalmssociety.org/goto/spotthecause